KLONDOR - Sages uncovered a mysterious weapon in the Ruins of Klondor this week, and the artifact has left many within the scholarly community troubled. The weapon, which resembles a metal-bladed sword, is claimed to have unique and disturbing powers. Master Seddigus Flanhoove, who led the expedition to Klondor, says that the find was initially exciting, but also puzzling.
“It was just laying at the bottom of a pile of rubble,” Flanhoove explained regarding his discovery. “It had a long blade and a handle, and after some time we decided that the weapon was distinctly sword-like.” This categorization, however, shed no light on the workings of the unusual item.
“Master Garrick and I consulted our Scrolls of Wisdom, but we found no mention of this particular sword.” This left the scholars no alternative but to experiment with the artifact, leading to an unsettling discovery. Explained Flanhoove, “Master Garrick and I decided to combat one another, he wielding the Flail of Nauseating Olfaction, and me with this new weapon.” According to Flanhoove, the sword’s power dramatically exceeded their expectations.
“I tried swinging it and threatening with it, thinking it might emit a Shower of Irritating Sparks or a Ray of Disorienting Vibrations or something of that sort, but we didn’t see anything like that. I was beginning to think it would be no match for Garrick’s flail, when suddenly, I struck Garrick’s arm with the tip of it. The weapon cut his skin, and he started bleeding.” Shaking his head, Flanhoove added, “We weren’t expecting power of that magnitude.”
Acclaimed warrior and renowned weapons expert, Sir Marcus Fledge, was shocked when news of the uncovered artifact reached him. “A sword with the ability to cut skin and cause bleeding is a powerful weapon indeed,” he told reporters Monday. “I have not seen that kind of ability since the discovery of the Horn of Bone-Jarring Cacophony nearly a century ago. But no weapon I know of today has the innate ability to cause slicing and bloodshed. That is a frightening power.” When asked how such a weapon might be used, Fledge admitted to being unsure. “It is not clear to me why anyone would imbue an item with such a dreadful ability. Whatever the reason, though, it is not a weapon to let fall into the wrong hands.”
Most experts agree that the artifact should be securely protected until the extent of its abilities can be better understood. Many fear that the Sword of Causing Nasty Injuries, as it has now been dubbed, would be very appealing to the Forces of Evil. “We have to watch the Sword very carefully as we study it,” Fledge said. “We cannot begin to imagine the potential harm that would result if the Forces of Evil were to take possession of it.”
The Forces of Evil could not be reached for comment. In the meantime, Fledge and Flanhoove are taking no chances.
“We consulted with Dungeon Master,” Flanhoove said, “And he told us ‘Sometime the rose with the sharpest thorn pricks the finger most securely embedded in the pocket.’ We are fairly sure that this means we should protect the Sword in a circle of enchanted flowers. Who knows how that’s supposed to help, but when dealing with such powerful mysteries as this artifact, I’m willing to follow DM’s wise judgement.”