ZAK'S FAVORITES:

"A rabbi, a priest, a lawyer and an aardvark go into a bar..." -Wulfgar
"Yes, Cavalier, *this* (pointing down) is *down*; *this* (thumb jerked upward) is *up*. Now, you wanted to also know the difference between *what* and a hole in the ground?" -Wulfgar

OTHER CAPTIONS:

• Dungeon Master: "Only when the path is dark will the way home . . . be . . . No, wait! Only when the *way* is . . . um . . . . Only when . . . . Oh, drat! Would you kids mind waiting here? I'm just going to pop over for a quick gander at the script."
    Kids: (groaning) "Not again!!"
    Eric: (storming off) "Oh, brother! I'll be in my trailer!"  -Rummi
  
• "Cavalier, sit! Good! Now go fetch!" -Heidi
• "No Young Ones, I am pretty sure you DON'T want to know what I wear under this thing!" -Heidi
• "Well after my taxi took me 50 miles west of where my heart lies I had to walk! Oh my feet are aching!" -Heidi
• "...so I asked the butcher, the baker, they didn't know. But the liquor store guy, he knew!" -Devin Harris
• "Thank you, thank you, and now for my next trick, I will make a politician tell the truth!" -Wulfgar
• "...you do the hokey-pokey, annnnnnnndddd *that's* what it's all abouuuuuuuuuutttt!" -Wulfgar
• DM (Briefly posessed by the spirit of Da Fonz): "Ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!! Yo, Malph, check out my new motorcycle boots!" -Wulfgar
• "And now, my pupils, you must face the ultimate evil. Are you strong enough to endure the horrors of........the MACERENA!!!" -Mike McNewbie
• "Diana, Sheila, don't look like that. I did something for you, now, you must do something for me...kneel and assume the position!" -Brenna Dawkins
• "Young Ones,only you can rescue my underpants from Venger!" -Thomas
• "Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Stayin' alive! Stayin' alive!" -Tannhäuser
• "The bunny goes THROUGH the hole, and then you PULL it tight!" -Tannhäuser
• "I see no reason to have done this here, Cavalier. The restrooms are a mere twenty yards behind me." -Kryschenn
• "And when the dragon's finger is in the right place, it may direct you to the way home." -Me, Myself, and Nobody Else
• "And, after travelling for ... uhh, a while ... in ... erm, that kind of direction ... you might come across something ... about that tall ... maybe a little shorter ... that might send you ... uhh, somewhere useful. Well, whaddaya expect first thing in the morning?" -Me, Myself, and Nobody Else
• "Yes, cavalier... before there, here now... is one of the advantages of the Masters..." -Óscar
• DM (Giving his star pupil an anatomy lesson):"Yes, Cavalier, they are indeed called 'feet'." -Super Lemmingo
• DM proving that size isn't always relative.... -Fay

I forgot to add the "Guess the episode" bit, but Óscar got it right anyway: Night of No Tomorrow.